you're always going to have a completely different connection and feel different emotions for the first person you kiss. no matter how long time passes, you'll always remember your first kiss.

Eyes gazing                        Looking                                        Searching. Small smile touching The bright brown eyes, Tired from excitement.   Big                  Wide   As I tried to take everything in.   My weary browns study the little girl In the eye catching pink coat With crazy blonde hair resting,                                                        carelessly. My mind begins to wonder; Where is the girl  I Was Once Before? 

young girl,   i    know   how    it    feels   to want to find  someone to look up to, someone to admire to connect with.    But    as i've grown    i've found   not everyone we look up to,  is exactly who we think. Good over shadows with bad  we like to believe there is   a    reason   behind   something    to see the good in everything,   But sometimes,    we need to except somebodies bad side,  to fully appreciate    the   good   in   them.

You're a black cloud that hangs over my head blocking light out of my mind. Seem to want to make me unhappy                                                             You're doing a good job.   But                                    I shouldn't give in. You make me not want to face the world, Make me want to stay behind closed doors Leave me with myself and my mind.  You make me feel like I'm not good enough That there is something not quite right about the way I am.   You make me feel as though the person I am, isn't acceptable, that I should change.

  Darkness.   Dusk rose in the sky,   The wind whispered through the trees   Softly, in cold air.       3 A.M The walls are sleeping.   My eyes are wide but clouded By gentle darkness.     Rainy days. Falling down the glass Wet, onto my reflection Pattering softly.         

At the moment, you don't know what the hell you want to do tomorrow, let alone in 5 years time. You were scared of change and the word makes your stomach twist inside of you, but I am hoping that you've changed and you no longer have that feeling towards the six letter word. I hope that you aspire for change and that everything you do is different to what you did before. You change every day and I want to befriend the feeling instead of in fear of it. At the moment, your mind is all over the place, you don't know what to expect when you start your new year in education and you're just at the point in your life where you just feel strange and everything is weird and you don't really understand why you feel a certain way, but you're also not unaware of it. Hopefully, now you don't feel like this and you love waking up in the morning, little things still bug you but you like living instead of sometimes resenting it, and I hope you'll be able to say y

Part of me, wants to say that recently I have felt lost, but I'm not sure if that is the category I want to and can put my feelings under. everything has been extremely overwhelming and exhausting, not the most optimistic words to use, I know. Despite that, this summer has brought me a lot of happiness, such as meeting somebody I have been friends with for a long while and class as one of the best people in my life, so I can't sit here and say how everything is shitty and nothing good has happened because that isn't true- as much as I may say this. I also got the chance to go to some beautiful places that I am ever so grateful and thankful for doing because it was a good, refreshing change of scenery and - for a little while - I felt at ease taking photographs of the raw, pure beauty of a certain city/town that I have seen second hand for as long as I can remember. However, with happiness comes sadness and nothing can ever be okay or fine for a long period of time.